Prairie Dog, Wyo., Augtember 97
(Special Dispatch) – Labor leaders here expressed themselves today as being in
favor of the plank to make "Ground-Hog Day" a national holiday, a move
endorsed by Pogo supporters. "If the possum becalms the President of the
Untied States, it will be our bounden duty to see to it that animals everywhere
come into their own," said one operator of seventy five prairie-dog hills
employing an estimated 346 workers.
Asked
if he had not meant "becomes" instead of "becalms", the
Prairie Dog Operator said, "No Comment."
An undercurrent of revolt, however, was
seen by some observers in the fact that the working prairie dog had not been
consulted on the matter. "We work all year long," said one who was
incapable of identifying himself, "and the Ground-Hogs sleep. They get up
and do one day’s work, which most of the time scares them half to death, and
they get a day named after them. In fact they are now being told that they can
have THAT day off. When we ask for a day off all we get is the Mary Haha. We are
told we can go whistle."
On the other hand, Pogo Poll Takers
have reported that Ground-Hog enthusiasts have set to music the old refrain,
"How much wood would a would wood would if a wood chuck chuck wood
would." Ground-Hogs, the wakeful ones, have indicated that the labor
problem, which the new move for a National Holiday brings up, is a formidable
one.
"We don’t get paid for
holidays," explained one. "We sleep through Christmas and January
first, both usually considered holidays. We don’t get them off. We work right
on through. Then at the end of our hitch, we get up to round up the winter’s
work. If it’s a nice bright day and we see a shadow, boom, we get another six
weeks work. If it’s raining, we get laid off with two weeks notice. Do you
call that fair? And now they want to take our last day’s pay away, besides
rigging it so that the layoff comes about automatically. Who are these lemmings
that go around proposing things? Why don’t they swim back where they came
from? They got labor problems of their own. If we need a holiday, we take
Christmas at double time."
Essentially this protest has been
drafted and is being sent to Pogo headquarters. The Presidential hopeful said
that the whole thing certainly made a man think. Pressed on what he was
thingking about, the Possum candidate referred the matter to an aide.
(Copyright, 1956, Walt Kelly)
